Honestly, I don’t know who wants to see this but here it is.
The First Annual Small Penis Invitational.
This contest was held to give away a trip to mexico with a bunch of porno stars. Howard invited about 20 guys down who claimed they had really small penis’. There were 3 guest judges plus the regulars like Howard and Robin. George is a fan from Chicago who just showed up this morning. He had a speech impediment so he fit right it. The impediment is caused by a cleft pallet. The second judge was the guy who does the Marv Albert impression so Howard called him Marv the whole time. The third guest judge was Gay Rich. Rich used to be an intern on Howard’s show. He moved on to better things but came in to judge the contest today. There was a hell of a lot going on with this contest.
There were a total of 16 contestants who actually came in the studio naked to show their small packages. The first guy almost won immediately. He had big man breasts and hardly any penis. After that there were tons of guys just showing off their tiny packages. Some of the guys who thought they were small changed their minds after seeing how small some of the others were. After all 16 introduced themselves the judges whittled down the list to 3 finalists. Those three were Philipe, Paul and Gary.
The three finalists then moved on to the talent portion of the game. Philipe was the first up. He was dressed like a construction worker. Howard asked him some personality questions then had him sing a song parody to an Elvis song. Paul was up next. He was dressed like a cowboy. Howard did the personality questions then had him sing ”I Just Can’t Find My Glands” to the tune of ”I Wanna Hold Your Hand”. The final contestant was Gary. Gary was dressed up like a police officer. He answered a couple of personality questions then sang his song ”Teenie Weenie” to the tune of ”Proud Mary”. They all performed quite well under pressure. After taking a break and tabulating the scores Baba Booey came back with the results. The winner was Paul. Second place when to Philipe and last went to Gary.
After the winner was announced the guy who set everything up, Scott Stein, called in with some good news. All three finalists get to go on the trip! Plus, Howard will be taking all of the guys who were in the contest to Scores for a special party.