Howard Stern and Arnold Schwarzenegger talk divorce

Howard said Arnold Schwarzenegger is back on the show. He said he thinks that his wife was keeping him off. Howard said he thinks that they haven’t spoken to him since they got to Sirius. (Fake) Arnold was on the phone and said Howard was right. Howard said he had a suspicion that his wife was keeping him off the show. Arnold said that they can say ”Ding Dong the Witch is Dead” now. Arnold said that he’s sitting around nude and doing whatever he wants now.

Robin asked where he’s living. Howard said he heard he kicked Maria out of the house. Arnold said he did and she’s been looking like a cadaver more and more lately. He said he can walk around nude now. Howard asked if he’s been with any women. Arnold said he’s doing the banging now.

Howard said it’s pretty remarkable how long that marriage lasted. Arnold said she was a pain in the ass. It went on for 25 years. Howard said it must have helped with his political career. Arnold said since Teddy died the Kennedy name doesn’t mean as much as it used to. He said he now knows why they drink too. He said he lived with one for 25 years and he had to drink.

Howard said it must be tough for the kids going through this. Arnold said this is a lesson to the kids. He said this is what happened to their daddy. Arnold said his wife used to make fun of his man boobs in front of the kids. Howard asked if he misses having a woman to help clean up. Arnold said he has Mexican maids cleaning up his shit. He said he can shit on the floor and not care about it now. Howard said it sounds like he’s in a happy place.

Robin asked if he would ever get married gain. He said he would not do that. He said Maria was more work than the retards at the special Olympics. He said you have to wipe their asses and tell them they did great and that’s what it was like with Maria.

Howard and Robin asked what he’s been doing lately. Arnold said he’s been hanging around the house naked and swinging his Conan the Barbarian sword around. Howard said it’s good to hear him on the show again. He said that should let people know that he’s a free wheeling guy again.

Howard asked Arnold if he would have run for president if he was legally eligible. Arnold said he would have and he would have gotten bin Laden a lot sooner. He said it would have been fantastic if he had been President. He said he has been banging a different woman every night since he left Maria. Arnold said none of this stuff compares to getting rid of the dead weight. Howard said he’s as free as a free bird. Arnold said he should come out and go drinking with him sometime. Howard let him go a short time later.

Howard went over what the Governor had just said and realized he still had him on the line. Arnold said he was just having a drink and smoking a stogie. Howard spent a minute talking to Arnold about the stuff they had just gone over. Howard said Arnold was very honest about all of that. Arnold said Maria was getting those wrinkles around her lips like she’s been blowing guys a lot. Robin said he said she looked like Skeletor too. Howard said he also said that the Kennedy name isn’t what it used to be since Teddy died. Howard said he didn’t mean to keep him on. He meant to hang up earlier.

Howard said that was shocking and just imagine if he had actually said it. Howard asked Gary for the plug for Fake Arnold. Gary said you can check him out at

Leave a Comment

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.